Yes, here I am and here is the story:
I love keeping this little space to share my heart, mind, thoughts with… well… whoever reads. But I have recently realized how uncomfortable I have been with who I am. I have always been one of those square pegs that never quit fit into the round hole I was given. I am so very understanding of the fact that I may live my life one way and others another and that is okay. But I never felt like I would be looked at the same by others. Having a blog that talks of alternative ways of living, parenting, and thinking has been very intimidating for me.
I was sitting at a table of women this past weekend and someone brought up that I make my own laundry detergent. My first thought was, “Great. How in the world am I going to explain to them that I’m not a hippy.” But then they started asking my questions and writing down the recipe, they were genuinely interested. They would ask me how I thought to research the idea and the only thing I could think to say was, “well, because I’m a weirdo.” I found myself pouring out all the information that I’ve learned and then apologizing. I realized after leaving that table that I am completely uncomfortable with me and my own interests. I have decided that I am going to be okay with me and the way that God has asked me to raise my family. I know that there are certain ways that we want to live that not everyone thinks is right or is for them. But I have come to the conclusion that there are two reasons you are reading this right now. You either are interested in who I am or interested in how I live. Otherwise you would not be reading.I want to be sure that this blog has a purpose, not just “Tabitha’s Crazy Ideas of Living.” I do apologize if anyone has felt like one idea is the absolute only way. That is not at all how I think. I am very aware that what is right for my family may be completely different for you and yours. This space will mostly be filled with alternative or creative parenting and living – through my eyes. My glimpse of the world. I do hope that you come and find inspiration, new ideas, and maybe a look at the world through different lenses. Because like I said, my look on life and this world is most likely very different from yours.
We came across this video from another blog and Scarlet’s eyes were glued the entire time. It’s so much fun to watch and see what interests her, how she thinks, creates, and imagines.
There is a huge part of this motherhood journey that I never anticipated. I never realized how many parenting decisions I would make based upon what I believe is right for us as an individual family and how many of those decisions would not be the norm. Looking back at my life and who I am, I should have guessed it. But it has been a very uncomfortable journey. I have constantly felt the need to apologize for my “weird take on things.” Recently, especially after watching many alternative parenting views become the trend, I have become more comfortable. I’m not really sure if it’s just because of timing or if I feel more comfortable with knowing that other parents are thinking the same way, or if I am just coming to another level of being cozy in my own skin.
So, as our little family greets spring with much excitement, this little part of my world will also start a new and refreshing season. As you can see, I have my pictures back up and running and I also have some other surprises in the works!
Yay! for new beginnings!